Copywriting
During my time with Texas Humor, I wrote product descriptions for the Texas-centric gear featured on the webstore. Below are some of my favorites from over the years.
Photography by me, unless otherwise noted.
What do you get when you mix the word “Y’all” and the famous three-word phrase uttered on the reg by McConaughey, the Golden Texan God himself? You get this here tee and this glorious saying that rivals even the best pairings of chips n’ queso, margaritas n’ beer, and football n’ Sundays. This tee brings the best of both worlds together, and will have ya feelin’ Yallright Yallright Yallright in no time.
We teamed up with the folks at Shinesty to bestow upon y'all this glorious one piece swimsuit that is 1836% Texan and 100% belongs at your pool party and/or backyard BBQ. Featuring an all-over print of crushed beer cans, this swimsuit will give you the strength of a thousand can-crushin' Texans and the confidence and swagger of McConaughey and Strait combined.
Featuring a slightly scooped neckline in front, extra scoop in back (now I'm thinkin’ about scooping chips
n' queso...)
Pair it with shorts to rock that Super Texan look out on deck
Or just wear it straight to the pool so everyone can bask in the magnificent glow of your
Texas pride
Seriously, y'all are gonna get compliments left and right on this swimsuit
For every super-Texan thing I've ever done, my love for Texas made me do it. If you start your sentences with "hey hold my beer" before embarking on any Texan activity, then y'all need this tee. Throw it on and then point to it when bystanders begin to question your sanity.
Sometimes I'm just here for the beer and that's it. This tee is for all y'all who ain't afraid to let everyone else know that you're really there for the best part of any wedding, birthday shindig, or holiday gathering: the free alcoholic beverages. It's how I introduce myself at all social events. "Hey nice to meet y'all, I'm Here For The Beer."
We did it, y'all. We finally made our very own Texas-themed PopSockets. Prepare to rejoice in Texan, and prepare to turn your phone into one Texcellent device:
Offers a secure grip for the back of your phone so you can text with one hand and eat tacos,
a big bowl of chili, and/or
chips n' queso
with the other. Also works for sipping a
margarita or three.
Pop it out and lay your phone down so you can watch
George Strait music videos, Selena’s Astrodome performance, or
videos of people failing at mechanical
bull rides
to your
heart's content. Or just use it to
watch "Dazed and Confused" for the fifth time
this week.
Take better selfies
in front of a gorgeous Texas sunset during a Friday Night Football game, or
with the beaver outside of Buc-ee's while you’re on a year-long Texas road trip.
Or just take better selfies out in a field of bluebonnets, while holding onto the bluebonneted beauty.
We're talkin' bluebonnet inception here, y'all.
Prickly Pear isn't just the flavor of a super tasty beer - it's also the State Plant of Texas. What's more Texan than prickly pears in the shape of Texas? You, wearing this shirt, riding a horse that's also standing inside of a pickup truck bed, cruising alongside a patch of prickly pears with a bag of tacos in one hand and a Dr Pepper in the other, maybe.
Photo courtesy of Ventana Media Collective
Life can be a beach, ya know? We made this tee to celebrate those beachin' good times out on South Padre Island, with plenty of cold beers, slammin' tunes, and the occasional orange seaweed that brushes your leg a little bit in the waves. Matthew McConaughey even approved of this shirt.*
(*No he didn't. He doesn't know this exists. But if he did, we'd like to think he'd approve.)
Photo courtesy of Georgia Zaborowski
Some states up north start experiencing this thing called “Winter” pretty early on. We’re talkin’ snow. We’re talkin’ ice. We’re talkin’ some 20-degrees-windchill-nonsense that ain’t no Texan got the time for. In Texas, “Winter” is this chillier time of year that’s mainly just real dang cold in the morning, but by afternoon we’re up at a mild 78 and sunny. And when we DO actually experience this “Winter” that everyone in Game of Thrones wouldn’t shut up about, it’s really just about 2-3 days in January. So throw this cozy long sleeve on and thank the good lord and George Strait that our winters are on the milder side.
Photo courtesy of Georgia Zaborowski
This Y'alliday sweater is ready to turn heads at your next holiday gathering. Impress your grandma, win over your significant other, or make Karen in Accounting beyond jealous in this outrageously Texan Christmas sweater. It features the festive prints of Santa Hoss steering his fleet of reindeer (or are they Jackalopes?) over a portrait of Piney Woods, bluebonnets, and Yellow Roses....because Texas. After all, 'tis the season to be Texan, y'all.
This shirt will make you wanna climb up the hilliest Hill Country hill and headbang for the gods. It'll make you 1836% more likely to fist bump the next Texan you see. You'll be unable to resist the urge to yell “TEXAS ROCKS!” at the top of your lungs every time you put this shirt on. Because Texas rocks, y'all. And it rocks hard.
Photo courtesy of Lane Collins Photography